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Why My Family Deserves Better From Me

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A new year will be here shortly and now that Christmas has ended I have been reflecting. Reflecting on this roller coaster of a year for my family and what I can do to make next year better. I spent time reflecting on my myself, the truth behind my smile, the kind of woman, wife, mother and friend I am and how I can improve as a person. Let me tell you what I discovered and why my family deserves better from me.

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Time is passing me by…

This year, more than any other, I noticed just how much my kids are growing up. They need me less and less in some ways, yet more than ever in other new ways (dating, anxiety, how to shower faster and more).

My son is halfway through his freshman year of high school and taller than me now, while my best girlfriend went from kindergarten to third grade in the time it took me to blink it seemed.

I recently looked up from my computer while working to hear my kids laughing and noticed my son’s voice had gotten deeper. When did that happen and how did I not notice it before? My mind raced with trying to figure out the last time I heard his voice before it changed. Thank goodness for videos.

I admit that with my crazy travel schedule this past year I missed out on a few things for my kids. I try not to beat myself up or get consumed with mom guilt about that because they have my husband, my son’s father and a host of good friends to help out when I am not around.

Plus I want the kids to see and know that it is ok for us to not be together all the time, while remembering I love them unconditionally.

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My family deserves better. There I said it.

Why my family deserves better from me is because when I am not traveling and actually home, they deserve my time. They deserve quality time with me which includes my undivided attention.

What they don’t deserve is having me glance up from my laptop or phone every now and then while they are trying to tell me a story about their day or ask for advice.

They don’t need me documenting every single moment of their lives or all of our special moments together.

They deserve to make unfiltered and offline memories with me. The type of priceless memories that aren’t concerned about likes, comments or algorithms.

Why my family deserves better from me each and every day is because life can be so short and they are too important for me to give them anything less than the best of me, even on the days where I don’t particularly feel like it.

What is something you plan to change or do more of in the new year?

Do you reflect on the past year and how you can improve before a new year begins? Find out why my family deserves better from me.

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AnnMarie John

Wednesday 26th of December 2018

I love this "The type of priceless memories that aren’t concerned about likes, comments or algorithms". It's why I no longer have comments turned on on IG or even on my blog. I don't give a rat's behind about those things anymore. I post and don't get back for quite some time. I'm currently relaxing and enjoy the holidays, but saw your post on IG and had to read it. Here's to a new year filled with love, peace and harmony.

Clarissa

Wednesday 26th of December 2018

Thank you for your comment friend. You are so right about that. It's time to go back to basics and focus on the things and people that truly matter. Here is to also seeing you more in the new year.